Review of What Kind of Mother by Judy Sandler

This is a raw and unflinching memoir of family, motherhood and a son’s struggles with mental ill health (bipolar disorder) and addiction. Every family has a definining narrative and it isn’t always a pretty one. Judy Sandler chose to write this memoir, in part, to shed her own shame around ‘failing’ to live up to the all-American ideal of cookie-cutter family life. But deeper than that, this memoir shows the power of overcoming that shame and guilt to move towards understanding and acceptance. Judy grapples with a lot of complex emotions throughout this book but we also hear from her son, James, in his own words as there are inclusions of diary entries which he gave Judy permission to use. This rawness in both content and form makes for a reading experience that I can only describe as heavy. Heavy, but incredibly worthwhile. If you’re interested in shedding stigma, family dynamics altered by addiction, the mechanics of mental health support in America and how mental ill health can affect relationships, I would definitely recommend this memoir but be cautious that some may find it a difficult read.

Published on 08.09.2026 by West Virginia UP

Reviewed by Abi